The term "nesting" has been thrown about often since it became obvious that the wife is expecting. "You'll know it's time when she starts nesting," people tell me. I know what they mean, but I can't fight back the vision of me coming home one day to find the wife perched atop the couch surrounded by sticks and straw. "I've nested," she'll say."Then it must be time," I'll reply. Another phrase I've learned is "raking straw." My secretary asked one afternoon if the wife had started "raking straw" yet. "I don't know," I replied, "she's never been much for yard work." I thought it was witty. "I'm serious," she said. "When she starts raking straw, that baby will be here in a blink."
I'm not qualified to say whether we've "nested" or not, but I'm pretty sure we've done everything necessary for Jasper to settle comfortably into his new digs. He'll have diapers, food, clothes, and a roof over his head. And speaking of roof over his head, let me mention at this point that the child will inhabit the BEST room in the house. Seriously--we're talking 250 square feet of prime real estate complete with fireplace, built-ins, wainscoting, and the largest bathroom in the house. This comes free of charge, of course, and is in addition to in-room dining, housekeeping, and free internet access, which makes me wonder why any of us ever decided to grow up and strike out our own. But back to the point, we've been in full prep mode these past two weeks, and we're ready for go-time. The wife has packed a bag, stocked the diaper bag, and latched in the car seat. She's washed onesies, bottles, and pacifiers, and has even typed a list of detailed instructions for her sister outlining the pre and post labor duties and responsibilities. I even took two days from work to clean, and I mean CLEAN, the house. I also cut the grass, string-trimmed, finished the spring planting, and all the other duties that befall the husband. We've done it all. The nest is built, and the straw is raked--we're as ready as we'll ever be.
My fear, though, is that Jasper truly is a product of his parents. I have no doubt that he's decided to enter the world on HIS terms and his terms alone. It's likely that he's decided that later is better, and when the time comes, the grass will, once again, need cutting, the house will need cleaning, and undoubtedly, we'll be far less prepared than we are now. The straw will need raking and the nest will be in disarray. We won't be prepared, but we won't be any less ready, and we watched Juno last week, so we know there's a big difference between the two...
1 comment:
You're right about two things. 1. You have nested, congratulations. 2. He will come on his own time when he's good and damn ready. So hard for the planner in us! Just imagine Ben hanging (precariously) from a ladder washing all of our exterior windows because surely the little newborn would be opening them and closing them the day she came home.... it HAD TO BE done. That was the height of my nesting.
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